Thursday, February 2, 2012

Lynchburg Airport is Gay

If this statement offends you take it up with the person who mentioned to me how flaming gay the new Lynchburg Airport sign be. I couldn't believe this. Although I do have ADHD I drive past the airport almost every day and you would think I would notice a new sign that is rainbow colored with flamenco dancing queens kicking up their heels atop the flashing lights.

It's magenta and the fact that I didn't even notice it leaves me wondering what the fuss is all about. Darrell Laurant has me beat on this one most definitely. I did not notice the sign so the people contacting him are seeing something I am not.

What do you think?

(credit: Erik Custer)

(Please note that I have the right to all grammatical and spelling errors including but not limited to run-on sentences, fragment sentences, ending sentences with prepositions, and all horrific forms of misspelling. It's my damn blog of, is, at, with.)

Ruby Groundhogs and Other Strattera Induced Hallucinations

I gotta tell you, Strattera is some stuff. It's kind of like having a lot of adrenaline in your blood but not being hyper or like waking up at 5 a.m. and thinking about running to your local store to buy ingredients to prepare jalepno poppers. Ok, that's not really what's it like but that's what I did this morning. I think Strattera may make you like this woman eventually:

It's groundhog day. We have a lot of groundhogs in Lynchburg. I always think they're cute and then Erik reminds me they have diseases and tear up people's gardens. He ruins everything. Well, not everything. Lewis C.K. ruined my thoughts on deer.

This may be the first year we local really don't need to see the 'ol hog. It's been the most mild winter ever, that I can recall. I miss sledding, but not that much.

Tomorrow is "Go Red Day" to raise awareness of heart disease. I wish I could say there is a group in Lynchburg participating but there isn't. I could have drummed something up I suppose but I just remembered yesterday so I guess I'll simply be wearing red. We do have a Macy's but I honestly don't frequent there since I got fired (totally a might have had something to do with the fact I called my boss a bitch) but this is the only event I know about.

If you know of anything a local business is doing for GO RED, do tell.

Meanwhile I really need to stock up on my costumes. I could be wearing an animal suit today and who knows what tomorrow...

Wednesday, February 1, 2012

I Don't Like Pink or Ladies But I Don't Mind This

The Farm Basket introduced a very fashionable line of clothing to their repertoire today. Since Sakinas closed, getting fashionable clothing is tough in Lynchburg. All we have is a J. Crew outlet and a few other hidden treasures. Then, of course, the mall. Bleh.

I hope they sell dresses. I prefer dresses...well I prefer costumes, but if I have to go somewhere, you know, where normal people go, I like to wear a dress. I checked out the Lilly Pulitzer's website and the dresses are really nice. They're expensive but really nice.

Of course, I read about the history of Lilly Pulitzer and had to laugh to myself. A woman of privilege is bored so she makes clothes for a living. I'm sorry--eye roll. That's so Boonesboro which is the crowd that usually patronizes The Farm Basket. I don't have $180 to spend on a dress. I wish I did but I don't!

I also wish I was born with my parent's money so I could make stuff and sell it then call it a living. But then I wouldn't be The Screw you've grown to love so well.

Of course, when I'm thin, rich, plastic, and not here, I'll disown all of you. You know that, right...;)

(I don't have money but I don't look scary either...well, today at least.)